18.06 – Suspense. Fear. Joy.


July 31, 2015

18 weeks 6 days.

Over the weekend, I was getting really worried because I didn’t feel anything.  I felt strange tiny pains but not what every mother has described as tickles and flutters.  I IMG_1596was soooo eager for Tuesday to arrive.  I wanted the doctor to tell me everything was okay.  I wanted the doctor to assure me what I felt and didn’t feel was normal.  And, lastly, after knowing everything was okay, we were eager to discover the gender of the baby in my belly.

On Tuesday at 1 o’clock, I finally lied down on an ultrasound bed, silently waiting for the technician to perform the ultrasound and complete all her observations.  After about 15 minutes, she sighed and said she couldn’t see the baby properly.  I fearfully asked if something was wrong.  She assured me that the baby was alive and moving but the problem was that it was giving her its back.  So she made me brisk walk/jog up and down the hall for about 10 minutes.

After returning to the dark room, the technician finally succeeded in identifying all the anatomical parts of the baby, including the gender…. The Baby is a BOY!!!  AND that little boy is fully healthy and fully alive!


I don’t know if it’s because I’m more aware of how big the baby is, and where he is, and what is actually going on in there, but on Wednesday, I finally felt the “flutters” everyone talks about.  In fact, I felt the baby move all. Day. Long! 

What did it actually feel like?

IMG_1579It felt as if a tiny little ant was crawling around inside my uterus.  It was so sweet and soft.  It made me so happy!

I’m so grateful for knowing all these things.

I’m so grateful that God provided humans with the brain to think up this technology.

I’m so grateful that I can know!

I’m so grateful for the little Lukas Castillo growing inside me!

The Happy Father
The Happy Father
Coming out of the social media baby closet.
Coming out of the social media baby closet.

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